


Grey Skies fill my Mind

by Danmairen



Series: in us we trust [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Bad Days, Fluff, GAD, Grey days, I think?, M/M, and there is like no dialogue sorry, i am just projecting onto poor wonwoo, seventeen suffers once again because i feel bad, they are lovely boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 06:17:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20990225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Danmairen/pseuds/Danmairen
Summary: Sometimes, we have bad days. Life is full of both great and horrible ones, but we can always find comfort in the fact, that the day breaks at dawn and begins anew tomorrow.Sometimes, it's more complicated than that. And that is when we need somebody.(Wonwoo has a bad day, and Mingyu does his best to simplybethere with him)





	Grey Skies fill my Mind

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was written a long time ago, but I couldn’t get myself to post it until now. After I wrote "Cats and the Worries that come with Them", I couldn't let go of the universe and characters, so since then, I have been writing all sorts of small stories about them. I will probably begin posting them at some point, because I actually really want to share them, but for now this will be my contribution to the WonHuiGyuHao-tag. Also, I tagged this as GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder), but I can only speak from my own experience, and therefore I truly do not want to pretend like I can speak for everyone who has GAD. If anything seems wrong or off, please do let me know!
> 
> This is technically set before "Cats and the Worries that come with Them", but it doesn't really matter. Hopefully, lots of other stories will follow this, and at that point I will have to make a propper timeline, but for now it does not mean much. If you are reading this, I hope you will enjoy the story~

Wonwoo had had his fair share of bad days, no doubt. He had even begun giving them names, so he could differ between them whenever anyone asked about it. He had the down-days, often before or after an exam, where his tired brain couldn’t cooperate with the energetic body. They were exhausting, if was exhausting to feel exhausted apparently, but they were few and not that complicated. Then there were the grey days, which were pretty much as they sounded, full of sadness and the constant anxious tickling in his bones. Sometimes he would begin a day in a great mood, but without reason spiral into anxiety and uneasiness, renting him pretty much unable to do anything the rest of the day. Those days were bad in another way than the others, because they could have been nice and calm, but just … didn’t. Mingyu really hated those days, as the older’s restlessness would often rub off on him, and then they were just two fumbling university students who couldn’t go a second before twisting their body or punching something. They had gotten used to them a long time ago, but they both knew to call a friend to avoid making the mess even bigger. It sucked but at least Wonwoo had a way to handle it.

But good god, these days were just awful. Utterly, annoyingly, nauseating-ly (As a creative writing major, Wonwoo felt a right to create new words whenever the language lacked a fitting one) awful. They were not bad like the others, something tangible or something which could be put into words. Days like this were empty days. They worked completely different from the other ones, especially because they weren’t really a one-day thing. They were rather weeks, at least 3 days, where his emotions just went all over the place. 

They could be triggered by anything at all, a missed assignment or a dinner dish gone wrong. Once it had begun because Minghao had forgotten his lunch for the fourth day in a row, and the minor annoyance touched upon something completely different in him. It was hard to really notice when these days came, unless he was together with someone else, as he didn’t really act that differently outside of his room. He would go to his classes, laugh along at lunch, continue his diligent notetaking when studying in the dinner across his facility. Back then no one would have known what had happened if Minghao hadn’t (finally) realised his forgetfulness on his way to his classes and had walked into the older’s apartment, where he had spend the last few days, only to find the older laying in his armchair, legs over the armrest and the rest of his body flopping off the seat. Minghao had had a portfolio on still pictures to finish and had decided to make Wonwoo’s plants the centre of it. 

The younger had carefully asked him what he was doing but gave up any hope of an answer when he saw how tired the older looked. It was not simply a tired face but one which seemed void of the will to do anything. The atmosphere had been unsettling to say the least, but Minghao had decided to ditch his classes and sat on the floor next to the older, flipping though a random book from the table. He wasn’t sure if any words would get through to the older, so the next best thing he could do was to keep him company. After and hour Wonwoo began stirring and after flopping down next to Minghao, he turned on the television and they stayed there for most of the day, without speaking more than a few words to each other. Their meals consisted of simple spaghetti with cabbage, the only thing left in the fridge, and they end up sleeping on the couch underneath a thin blanket. 

The next day had surely been better, but no matter how much he tried, Wonwoo couldn’t explain what had happened. He had woken up and immediately knew he wouldn’t get out of the door. He had tried to get some reading done, but somehow couldn’t do it. He had tried to make himself a simple breakfast but couldn’t. He could physically move, but he couldn’t do anything. Minghao had tried to help him, but the younger was more intuitive than systematic when it came to emotions and wasn’t able to give the older any words for what he had seen. When Mingyu sulked about not being invited to their cuddle party, Wonwoo said that he had felt empty, and it had been the closest he could get to placing a word on it. Mingyu had understood that he shouldn’t poke more into the matter, so instead he deepened his pout and proclaimed that he “could have filled out all that empty Wonwoo with love and food”. They had all had a laugh and left the matter behind, even though they were all aware that it wouldn’t be the last time it happened. And sure, here he was, empty again.

It was a weird feeling, being empty that is. He could spend hours watching television and laughing at it, but the moment it was turned off or interrupted, he felt like a sack of flour in the rain, slowly becoming a puddle of goo and dirt. Since Junhui joined them, he had only had two of these episodes, and they had been rather short. Awful but possible to overcome. 

Four days of worrying was apparently a new way to trigger the emptiness, consuming everything inside him overnight and leaving only a restless corpse behind. He had two papers to hand in in literally two days, buy train tickets home for the weekend and find a way to bring all his books with him. He had thoroughly read his assignments and he knew how to write them, and the train tickets were easy to get a hold of. The books wouldn’t be a bother either since his backpack was very spacious, but it was too overwhelming to press the Word-icon on his computer or to try and access the online ticket booth. 

Hell, if he asked Jeonghan, his sloth-like friend would probably willingly help him out, but he couldn’t do it. It made Wonwoo want to be furious, that it was so easy, and he still could not do it. He wanted to be angry or sad but instead he felt nothing. Everything was so-so. Not terrible but not good. So damn annoying.  
***  
Mingyu stepped into Wonwoo’s apartment at exactly 7 o’clock and noticed the lack of overall sound. The older had forgotten about their plans for dinner, eating together while the Chinese duo checked out a new Chinese restaurant in the area, to asses just how terrible they could make the dishes. Mingyu had wanted to try out a new recipe he had gotten from Seokmin, and Wonwoo had suggested that they ate together, much to the youngers delight. It was clear that their plans would have to be revised, as Mingyu got a proper look at the older’s face. Being together for years now had made him an expert at reading the small tell-tale signs, and what he found made him frown. At least the older had been somewhat responsive, smiling weakly at Mingyu when he reached out for his hand.  
“So that’s why you didn’t reply in the group chat” Mingyu stated, keeping all his questions to himself at the moment. Wonwoo would never let a chance to throw insults at Soonyoung go by, so the lack of said insults when their energetic friend had posted a clip of himself and Seokmin thoroughly embarrassing themselves in public, had led Mingyu to believe something wasn’t quite right. Wonwoo let out a short laugh, but it was clear he really wasn’t feeling well. His eyes were slowly moving around the room, looking for something but not really focusing on anything. It hurt to see him like this and could Mingyu do anything about it he would. But as much as he hated to admit it, this was not something he could solve. 

He pulled the older into a hug and held tightly onto him. Wonwoo just stayed there for some time before hugging back, loosely and without real conviction, but Mingyu was satisfied with it. As long as the older could respond, verbally or not, he was not completely out of reach. Thus, as he pulled back and the older fall back onto his chair, his lips formed a careful smile and he pressed a short kiss onto his beloved Hyung’s forehead. He couldn’t do anything besides being there, and this he would do. He would just stay there and bring some life into the apartment, feed him and let him go to bed. 

“I’ll go cook something up, and then we can eat while watching a movie or something. Does that sound alright?” he asked the older, who was now sitting with his feet on the chair. He got an affirmative noise from the other, and another quick smile. Oh, how he hated the empty smile, the one which didn’t reach his eyes at all. Not because it was ugly or anything, but it was forced, and Mingyu hated it. He squeezed Wonwoo’s hand one last time before grabbing the green blanket from the back of the couch and spread it on to of his curled-up host. As he walked into the kitchen and began grabbing the necessary tools for their meal, he could hear the television being turned on and how the channel was continuously changed for a time. When Mingyu placed the soup broth onto the stove the zapping stopped, and he let out an honest laugh when he realized what the older had chosen to watch. 

Wonwoo was a man of many values and interests, which made it harder to predict what he would choose. If it had been Minghao, he would definitely choose to watch a romantic movie, especially if he was in a bad mood, and with Junhui it would either be a documentary about deep sea animals, anime or a children’s show. But of course, their very own bookworm would choose a history documentary. “Oh, you found something! What is it about hyung?” Mingyu called, tying check if the other was up for a chat or not. They had worked out these small messages years ago, when they had begun spending more time together, and it would seem that even in his state of … well, state of nothing, really, Wonwoo could still decipher his real question.

“Ancient Egypt” the older quietly replied, but Mingyu heard it through the bobbling of the soup and the exotic tones from the speakers. He gave the other a loud hum in reply and otherwise kept quiet while he chopped up the ingredients for the soup. He knew Wonwoo disliked anything fat when feeling down, so he refrained form adding cream like Seokmin had advised him, but the vegetables would be good for the older and it might be able to give him some energy. It was hard to navigate these situations, as Mingyu was a man of words and Wonwoo was most definitely not in a mood for talking. They had never directly discussed how to handle these situations, but Mingyu had come to understand that the older needed for someone else to take control when he felt down. It was easier to do something when there was someone to guide you though it, like telling him to find something to watch instead of asking him what he wanted to do. Wonwoo was usually the most level-headed of their quartet, which resulted in him usually being the one to advise and help the others. 

Mingyu was pretty good at keeping himself together, and the same went for Minghao, but when they became overwhelmed, they knew they had an anchor to cling onto. Junhui was a bit of another case, but Wonwoo was undoubtedly the best at calming him down and his most frequent advisor. And while Wonwoo was open about his feelings and thoughts, he had never been the best at stopping before he fell off the edge, always telling himself that there was at least ten centimetres before the ground underneath him would give away. 

It hurt Mingyu that his beloved hyung could not see how much of himself he put into helping others, and after one unusually rough bout of anxiety from Wonwoo, Mingyu had made at promise with the two Chinese men, who had been there with them. They promised each other that, if and when, their friend misstepped and fell down, they would drop whatever they were doing and rush to catch him. He deserved that and they loved him too much to let the darkness bruise him. That stupid, selfless fool…

It took less than ten minutes before Mingyu stepped into the living room again with two mugs in his hands and a stupid smile on his face. Wonwoo had moved from the armchair and was laying on the mustard coloured couch, staring at the screen with his empty and tired expression. Mingyu sat down beside the older and put the cups on the coffee table before he reached out for the human-bundle he cared so much for. Slowly he pulled the older into a sitting position and stroke his hair for a bit, enjoying the calm atmosphere. Wonwoo kept staring at the screen, but let his arm touch the younger’s and seemed a bit more relaxed. 

Mingyu had not been sure whether the other would mind skin ship when feeling like this, but when he felt the other lean into him, he knew he had done the right thing. He didn’t push it further though, and instead grabbed a mug for the older and gave it to him, whom held onto it, enjoying the warmth it gave him. He looked to soft in his big sweater and glasses, and Mingyu honestly felt like squeezing him. But now was not the time for that, and instead he began sipping from his own mug to give the other his space. 

They had quietly watched the program for some time, when Mingyu began asking the other simple questions about the ancient culture in the middle east. Wonwoo didn’t react at first, his eyes still empty and unfocused, but he slowly began answering the questions, not entirely there but he seemed to slowly come back to himself. Slowly he would come back to himself like he always did, he just needed to get better.

A new program about World War 2 had begun playing after the documentary ended when Wonwoo spoke up, voice a bit less slurry than before. “Thank you for the soup. I liked it” he said and looked at the younger. He had always been honest with his feelings and thoughts and Mingyu liked how it never changed, no matter how sad or angry he might be. The simple comment made him laugh a little, with how simple and yet valuable it was, and he straitened up a bit, reaching for the others face. Dark circles framed his eyes and his skin felt oily but compared to how void the had looked when he first arrived, something inside Mingyu sparked when he saw a glow of something in them. He stroke Wonwoo’s cheeks for a bit without really knowing why, before letting his forehead rest on the others and closing his eyes.

“It must have been the Italian parsley. It makes it sweeter” he joked, eyes opening when he heard the soft laughter from the older. It felt so natural to see the shy smile appear on Wonwoo’s face and being able to observe it this close just made the view even more stunning. There was no punch on the arm or broad smile, but this was more than enough for now. Mingyu nuzzled his nose into the other’s black locks before leaning back with the smile he knew Wonwoo would call his “silly puppy smile”. The older’s eyes locked with his own for a moment, before he turned back to the television, focusing on the tanks rolling across the screen. Mingyu almost didn’t catch the older’s final comment, as he walked to the kitchen to refill their cups, but when he did, he couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Definitely the parsley”

Sure, it wasn’t that funny, but it felt so nice to hear it, especially with the added hint to teasing in his voice.  
Every bad day end at some point, and this one might begin clearing away. Mingyu had seen the papers scattered around the room, a clear sign that some assignment was bothering him, but this evening was theirs and school could wait for tomorrow. He had a boyfriend to feed and care for, so Shakespeare’s creative language had to wait another ten hours or so. It wasn’t going anywhere. Or he at least hoped so, that would really be scary.

(Minghao and Junhui had apparently been absolutely horrified at the cuisines and flooded their private group chat with pictured of them pulling faces at the food, which truly did look disgusting. Wonwoo kept quiet but followed the conversation, as Mingyu began bragging about his soup, and asked the younger to say hi from him as they began greeting each other good night in the chat. The message prompted a river of gifs and messages entirely in caps lock, wishing him a lovely night and dreams of friendly pigs. And as the channel continued its documentary spree, Mingyu pulled the older closer to him, letting an arm rest around his shoulders. Wonwoo allowed the contact and let his body relax into the others side, slowly filling his emptiness up with the others presence. Perhaps Mingyu has been right about being able to fill the space with love and food, but that was only for Wonwoo to know. No need to feed his cheesy side even more.)


End file.
